It's important when fighting the transition to sleeping in a crib away from mom and dad to employ the following techniques in order to weasel yourself back into the bed.
Technique #1: Saddy Face Cry
Turn on the water works and copious amounts of bottom lip action. When properly executed. Saddy face should convey to mom and dad that this time is not a fake cry, but that you really really mean it this time. Unfortunately this almost never works because mom and dad see right through the subterfuge. That's why saddy face must always be combined with other techniques.
Technique #2: The Pacifier Drop.
The Pacifier Drop is a dangerous move. Especially if mom and dad are resolved not to be manipulated. If performed poorly the Pacifier Drop could leave you without a pacifier for the whole night. So execute this technique with care. When your relentless screaming has caused your sleep deprived parents to crack their eyelids open to ensure you have not fallen out of your crib onto your head drop your pacifier on the floor for them to clearly see. This will force them to get out of bed and attempt to console you.
Don't be fooled by their reassuring back pats they mean to abandon you the second you shut your mouth.
Technique #3: Fall to Your Death
If techniques 1 and 2 fail then the only option available is the kamikaze. In most cases the panic sent directly to the adrenal gland will rocket your parents out of bed to catch you as you fall from your crib. Again, this is true in "most" cases.
Sometimes merely the threat of kamikaze is enough to win your place back in bed between mom and dad.
To threaten kamikaze stack your stuffed animals in a corner and pull yourself as far up onto the crib railing as possible. Now lean out over the abiss. (Note: For some reason this technique is most effective when acompanied by a sudden silence.)
More techniques to come. Stay tuned.
